Thursday, August 02, 2007

Reason #8 Why it's Better to be a Man Than a Woman


UNASHAMED NUDITY.

So the wife and I went swimming the other day and the conversation steered towards the community shower in the men's locker room (a.k.a. the "Tree of Life" in Utah circles). In just about every men's locker room at every large college, rec. center, swimming pool I've been to they've had this. While it took a little while to get used to at first (teenage years), it hasn't really bothered me since and I now willingly go starkers without a second thought.

She, however, was shocked to find out that men all shower in the same room.

I, on the other hand, was shocked to find out that the women don't.

No, they have their own little stalls where they can shower in absolute privacy, away from the prying eyes of other women.

Men don't have this problem. The other day I was in said community shower with the CEO of my company. We talked business just like we would have if we were in his office. And it wasn't awkward at all. In fact, you can pass a flabby, wrinkly, naked old-man with hairy moles in the locker room with nothing more than a "hey, how's it going?" and it's not weird at all.

Another example: My wife had a best friend in college. They were very close. They lived together, in the same room, for over a year. Every time they changed clothes they would lock themselves in the bathroom. Around the same time I moved in with this best friend's fiance. I think it was about two days before we started mooning each other on a regular basis.

I don't get it. Why are women like this? Aren't they supposed to be the more caring, compassionate gender? Shouldn't they feel comfortable with their bodies around other women if it's MEN who are judgemental and only care about looks, as so many women claim?

This only goes to further my theory that women don't dress up, put on make up, color their hair, artificially enlarge their breasts, or do the dozen other ridiculous things they do to look good for men. They do it for OTHER WOMEN. For the most part, anyway.

Me, I'll willingly moon just about anyone in the right situation and not feel in the least bit ashamed of my hairy wassum.

And that's why it's better to be a man.

5 comments:

Josh said...

"Shouldn't they feel comfortable with their bodies around other women if it's MEN who are judgemental and only care about looks, as so many women claim?"

You said it all right there. Women are insecure because they know how harshly they will be judged by other women. We simply take the blame for it. I am sure this is not the whole of their insecurities, but it certainly explains a lot.

Derek said...

Come on, Boogan. You and I are both adonises, which makes this sort of thing a lot easier.

There are but few times when it's embarrassing to be a perfectly sculpted male.

Beau Sorensen said...

Speaking of mooning, I don't think I've ever told you of the quad moon I once did. Long story short, my stepbrother was in bed, I got him to turn around, he saw a full moon. The room had mirrors on 3 sides, so as he turned his head I managed to get him from every angle. Oh, it was glorious.

themickel said...

That is amazing, Sorro. That truly surpasses any of my moons, even the one I gave while driving 80mph on a winding Colorado interstate on the way to a U2 concert.

Derek said...

My wife and I had the same conversation. It feels good to know that this is not just me and her.