Going to Chicaaago

Hey everyone. We're going on a week vacation/work trip to Chicago tomorrow. That isn't the reason for my not blogging much lately though. That would be sheer laziness.

Anyways, 7 days, me and the wife, no baby, downtown Chicago, Cubs game on Tuesday, side trip to Michigan, fun, fun, fun. I'll do a couple posts if we get the chance. Peace out.

Uh-oh

As if to confirm yesterday's post, I log on to espn.com this morning to find this:

Donaghy: Refs Altered Playoff Games

Suddenly baseball's steroids scandal isn't looking so bad...

Lakers, Celts, and the Evil Puppet-Master

Let me first say that I'm loving these NBA Finals. Really. I'm completely psyched about them. I mean, a Lakers - Celtics match up. Feels like I'm a kid wearing pegged Guess jeans and watching Duck Tales all over again.

Lakers - Celtics. KG and Kobe. There's an excitement there that comes only rarely in sports, an excitement that comes with the knowledge that what you are watching is a special moment. The last time I felt this excitement?

McGuire and Sosa racing to beat Maris' home run record.

And we all know how that turned out. (If you don't, google 'McGuire and steroids')

And this is what scares me about Lakers - Celtics 2008. It's a little too similar to the McGuire and Sosa era. Was Lakers-Celts entirely fabricated too? Helped along, like McGuire's home runs, by some artificial outside power that has no place in sports?

Think about it. The NBA is coming off years of substandard Finals performances (Cavs, Pistons, Spurs, yikes) abominable officiating, image problems, the inequality of the conferences, and one of the worst scandals in league history (Tim Donaghey, who is only brought up now to bring up how he's not brought up anymore) and suddenly, inexplicably, the two marquee franchises who make up the biggest rivalry in sports get ridiculous trades that immediately make them serious contenders, thus redirecting the public's attention from the corruption and other problems while bringing in millions in revenue and reviving the league. No one finds that suspicious?

Let me clarify. I don't think the NBA rigged games to get these two in the Finals. I think they rigged trades. Or at least looked the other way when GM's with conflicting loyalties made astoundingly stupid trades.

How else do you explain the Lakers getting Gasol from Memphis for what they did? Or even the Celtics getting KG and Pierce? If you don't follow sports, these trades were like going to a car dealership to trade in your old Dodge Neon and coming out with a Lexus, $5,000, and tickets to the Superbowl. There's no way these trades pass in a fantasy league, yet the NBA is ok with them? Bill Simmons made a great point about this, saying that if the Spurs or Suns (or even the Jazz) had made such a trade there would have been rioting, but since it was the Lakers and Celts and it helps out the league (just like McGuire/Sosa chasing the Maris record was 'good for the league') we don't have a problem with it.

Messed up.

So that's my conspiracy theory for the day. Once the Finals are over we should look into it. But not until they're over, because this is just too good.

Got to give it to pro-wrestling. At least they'll admit their plotlines are contrived.

Weezer Pork and Beans

I like Weezer, I like parodies, and I like viral videos. Therefore, I love this video.

(Best part: the Chris McCandles hug)

The Best Thing that has Happened to me Today

So I'm doing my usual morning trudge through the day's resumes, eyes glazing over as I scan line after line of info like "Office Development Manager - Responsible for management of 15 person title insurance office" or, "Wal-Mart Associate - Oversaw stocking and distribution of diversity of breads" when, from out of nowhere, the following gem bursts forth causing me to rotflmao:

Experience:
2003-2007 _Oscar Mayer - Public Relations_

• Promote Oscar Mayer as goodwill ambassador throughout country in Wienermobile

That's right, this person spent the last 4 years promoting Oscar Mayer throughout the country as a goodwill ambassador in the Wienermobile.

Now, that's funny on a number of levels. First, the fact that Oscar Mayer actually pays people to drive around in a car shaped like a giant hot dog and speak to the public. Second, their attempt to dignify the practice by calling the people in those giant hot dogs "Goodwill Ambassadors", and third, the fact that this guy has successfully incorporated the word "Wienermobile" in a professional resume.

I love it.

And yes, this is the type of thing that qualifies as interesting at my job. So that gives you some idea of what my days are like.