Chuck Wagon and Stu Jackson

My favorite part of the quote to the right is the fact that Charles Barkley is criticizing fat people. Somehow he fails to see the irony in a 350-pound ex-athlete going off on "people who don't work out and can't stop eating". That's like Hillary Clinton criticizing someone for being a selfish, delusional prima donna. Ba-DOOM CHA!

(Sorry for offending any Hillary supporters out there. Though, of the four people who actually read my blog I can only see one person who may have been offended.)

And while we're on basketball - I must say I've had the rare sensation of actually being impressed with the NBA front office over the last two days. First they announce they will begin fining players for flopping next year (they'll make enough off of Manu Ginobli alone to finance the WNBA for another 4 years), then they come out today and actually admit that they blew the call at the end of the Lakers-Spurs game.

Wow. I'm speechless. It's as if David Stern and Stu Jackson sat down for a planning meeting a week ago and said, "You know, what if we did something that didn't alienate and disaffect our fans? I mean, I know our current strategy has been working well, but why not change things up a bit?"

If they keep this up, we may actually see the best 16 teams play in the playoffs someday. On second thought, nah.

An observation I had at work the other day that will, if nothing else, help you see how dull the office can be...

After going an entire lifetime and not coming across the name, I've had two people named "Ren" apply for jobs within the same week*.




*Cartoon Chihuahua's don't count. Because I know that's where Mister J, Sidwello, and possibly Sorro were going.

The Old Timers Club

Can I just say, despite a moderate level of excitement for the new Indiana Jones movie, I'm deeply sorry to see Harrison Ford join the ranks of Once Famous Action Superstar Trying to Resurrect a Franchise Despite Soggy Man Boobs (or OIFA, as they are known on the NYSE)

You know what I'm talking about: Arnold's offering was Terminator 3, Bruce Willis joined with Live Free or Die Hard, Stallone is the current president of OIFA with his shameless dredging up of both the Rocky AND Rambo franchises within a year of each other, and with Harrison Ford has now officially joined the club with Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. If Mel Gibson dons the leathers for another run at Mad Max, we may need to get Congress involved.

I had always hoped Ford would not go there. I mean, Sly I can see, but I always figured Ford had too much dignity for it. I also don't see what is left for Indiana Jones to do, since he is ostensibly immortal after finding the Holy Grail at the end of the last movie. How do you top that?

By centering the plot around an obscure artifact from a civilization most of the world isn't familiar with, apparently. Is it just me or is this a little too similar to "Temple of Doom"?

The thing is you tarnish your legacy when you do this. Like when Michael Jordan came back for the 3rd time to play with the Wizards. You just need to walk away. Showing up in less than the full glory we remember you in takes away from your mystique.

Tell you what, if I ever become an immensely famous action hero, I will refuse to play an action role once I'm over 50. You have my word on that.

Interview

So yesterday I interviewed a guy who I had once seen hypnotized at a hypnotist show during my college years.

Let me tell you - it's not easy to keep a straight face in an interview while memories of the candidate wafting his arms gently up and down like an octopus and addressing the crowd in an arcane alien dialect go through your mind. And I was almost able to.

Almost.

In Memorium: Jazz 07-08 Season

I was going to write a post about the Jazz's recent demise, but I felt my feelings about game six can best be expressed through Hiaku:

Rally from twelve down

Bricks of thunder shatter hope

Tears fall like Spring rain

Salt Lake Half-Marathon

I know, I don't blog much anymore. I'm doing some writing on the side again and I've noticed when I'm doing that I don't blog nearly as much.

Anyways, not a whole lot going on at the moment (at least nothing I can blog about). We're looking at selling our house, I've got about 15 different jobs to fill at work, the Jazz pulled a turd for the ages in game 5, and I'm so sick of hearing about the Democratic nomination I've momentarily banned the news media from my life. That's what's going on in my life.

How are you? Good? Good.

A couple weeks ago a buddy and I ran the Salt Lake Half-Marathon, which was actually a lot of fun despite a crippling case of morning diarrhea. I'll try to dig up a pic of that for you. In the meantime, here're some other pics.

I haven't been one for distance running and did it just to see what it'd be like and ended up liking it quite a bit. The race starts at Legacy Bridge up at the U, winds through Salt Lake nieghborhoods, then ends at Gateway.

If you look really close, right there at the back towards the middle, you will see a little dot next to another dot. That's me.

The guy who won it. That's not me, if you weren't sure.

Basically he ran 26 miles in the same amount of time it took me to run 13. I'm not upset though--his shoes are clearly better than mine.

A huge crowd gathered at Gateway for the finish.

Mom, Jim, me, crowd.

Me, the tot (we can't call Katie 'the baby' anymore, so now she's 'the tot'), and Bret. After the race we went and ate at Denny's. It was the best Moons Over My Hammy any human has ever consumed EVER.